where too start

i have so much to say but i wont board my self so i pick one point today to write about
i want to say i am thankful as i was driving home today from cub and reflexing on my life two house down moved out three months ago really no notice and now two house other side of me movied out really no notice these are owners not not renter this are families with 5 and 6 children . it makes me thankful and sad at same time . i am so so grateful i am no where losing ,my house . or my job !
now things have not been easy raising four kids one in college one in private high school and 2 younger ones while dh lost his business after 10 yrs .we have huge dept from the lost but i think positive and things will work out . on to positive note as i am thankful i am needing to move my family form there home , school and friends .
With this Christmas season coming on us i want my kids to be grateful as am for my life we live . do they know . i had a long time friend a friends i was friends with in grade school (that ages me ) tell me i went to visit her maybe 10 yr ago after not seeing or talking for about 20yr anyway she still lives in same small town we grow up . she said this is the poorest county in the state of California hum i did not know how poor i was . i am mean i know we did not have a lot of money i did not get everything i wanted and times where hard . we moved a ton when i was a kid but my . i possible felt a little different then other kids but that was because my family was different . i hope my children don't feel like that ever but i want them to be greatful for what they have .
i want them to remember this season it not what you want but what you have . i want them to remember there will always be other with more and lothers with less .... hard lesson to live with .

December

i have been busy focus on Christmas with my own family and childcare .
present i don't think my list is to long i do do my girls school staff . i do the childcare children , my parents and my brother but that it . then comes my four children . two still believe or want to believe in Santa . i try to do three gift from us (usually book and clothes when younger used to get pj to wear that night ) then three gift from Santa and a stocking . now times this all by 4 kids it a lot of gift under that tree 24 gifts or more .. i really don't want to ever over due gift to my children , they have all the need but i love to give them one want the at Christmas isn't that Christmas about in the magic of the season.
i also don't want to lose site of the reason for season for my children and we try not we have many traditions to hold this to heart .
well my sons home for christmas break his grade are pretty good for a freeman first semter if he continutes through college with these grade i be happy he not a A student or should say he got many A through the year but not his thing does what it take to get through and well that good enough for him . so we got two A three B and a C so not bad .....

as this year comes to an end i sit and reflex how far all the kids have come and where we are all going ... merry christmas

world wind life raising kids

where this month go . i have thought many time come to post or write .
there so much going on so i live one day and don't know much ahead of it . i have always lived my life this was helps with stress . i mean i am a planning , list maker and love note cards and post it notes lol . i plan for vacations sport fee and holidays . Christmas . Christmas to me is much simply then what it used to be . i love sitting down and having family dinner , watching my kids sing in church on Christmas eve and being in the Christmas play .
we have had some heart breaks this week my oldest dd got cut from basketball high school , it was a little shocker as she a great Athletic but basketball not her main sport . she also hurt all through try out and wrong shoes all three days . och ok we are over and i am sure bigger and better things to come .
i kind of miss my son it been like a month or it seems scents he been home be home Tuesday night yahoo .... until Sunday . i just want to see he ok i guess . i am one proud mama though .'
the girls they are good keeping us jumping busy both play basketball that 3 to 4 nights a week between two off them
one or two nights at church or and school . we all doing good growing up so much i wish some times i could freeze that time for just a minute .
i feel very blessed this Christmas
work is good , dh at least working part time . on average with looks of staying on most of the time .
i am taking little pieces of my house and clearing them out and cleaning them up i sure wish i had more time to do it or hum engery to or the want but bady sets are good right . today was bathroom closet and upstair bathroom and set up holiday deco out side (had to the weather was great )

Why didnot i know parents was not easy for my mom

i hate all the choose we make to be good parents . i know sounds funny but i wish i could get my kids to understand . i know it sucks i say no but i have reason . it not easy for me either to say no . why did not i know this when i was a kid a teen . why i am i just learning this now at 40 . i love my kids i do anything and i am a parents that will specific things for my children . time and money if there is spent with them (with in reason of course and balance it all ) . i just want what best for them , keeping them safe helping them grow up making good decisions of course . why is it hard and as teens harder for them to see . it all dumb stuff but to a teen i know it now and they think i am the meanest mom in world . it a fine line to walk to find a medium and not push them to far away . i am sure some of the thing i say no would be OK . my kids are good kids , get good grade ,decanted to sportsmanship and they church but still they are teens and my job to guild them and say no ! i am sure tomorrow it be something new to say no to and one of them wont like me much tomorrow . joys of parent hood i guess .

ok i almost feel the pit in my tummy

i feel bad as it not my kids fault i had 4 kids ! hehe is it ?
ok basketball season just hit and here we go 3 play all three girls
three teams
mean 4 days a week practice and 2 games Friday night that the little girls then add
nik everyday after school practice until 5 , games a few times a week and a few sat , then sat morning two of three have pitching practice with a coach for softball and then Sunday oldest has softball
life over how we knew it for a month . i feel bad thinking i dont want to . it not there fault there 4 of them or three now at home .
add church Sunday morning , Sunday school Sunday night rehearsal for dance at church , thurs after school chorus church oh yah after Sunday school they singing in another chorus

now that sounds bad but if it was x one not so much we do limit one sport preseason and church but it just x three sorry no other why
then add school things , girls scoot and friends . hum me cleaning house cooking and shopping
makes my head spin thinking tummy sick thinking
ok done whinny
i love them

i know life got a way from me

i think to post as it great for me but then it just get away from me and rather deal with it with my self
where to start. omg my kids i am sue would kill me if they know that why i write here then on face book or somewhere else
oldest my baby boy hehe 18 away at college and well not doing bad i know could be tons worst and he not the first this happen to but he had to drop English he failing and to late to make it up . hello you need this class no way around this class kid and 500 flushed ! omg ok i breath now and see how this all plays out . now i am just praying he is passing all other classes . can you say kick your butt kid .
my first daughter my blue eye Blondie , smart dating can i wish her to date a nice guy . she kind of but i worry he to nice and well she wont like him he could be to good . she went to the movies with him today and he paid wow and she asked him to Sadie's dance at her school girls ask the guy you know . so we will see
small world here tho we know his family . my husband grow up with his mom , she a teacher around here and 1/2 kids we know had her as a teacher and she tutored my son and brother when they where in 4th and 5th grade . small world ..
Randi middle daughter omg this child going to be the life at me not sure what it is but she can push me and dh to the hill .where i feel bad i don't want to be around her as all i want to do is yell . she yells , screams . she fight with everyone in the house . i am not sure how to stop this all . she like her brother in a lot of way she just got over smarts on top of it (a little gifted _)
Dani well she dani still hates bath , homework but she loving caring . lost three teeth in one week crazy
just going alone balance life work , kids marriage ,family and life
all working ok we all healthily , have good roof over our heads and moving forward . no huge bumps today
love it all

The world wind of my life

All well girls busy . aaron doing well . he a great kid he was daown for nicole confirmation and work with husban on sat and never asked about being paid or how much or i am board as there was not really a lot for him to do he just did it as we asked . school going well i hope his grades are too.
nicole moody crabby 15 year old she start drivers ed tonight and will be done in three weeks only goes three times a week and then will take test right away and get behide wheel then in 6 months tops 7 she be driving which will help us actual so we all for it .
Randi still same wants to grow up and be a teen NO>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Dani she good our baby holly cow last two teeth two days in a row lol she also trying to fig all this out about the girl changes . this is big talk in our period, aunt flo ect big talk here.... i keep trying to tell girls they have a few years i amj sure like round 12 .. funny younest ask and worried on things like how will you know , does it feel like u got to pee .. i always feel so bad for these little girls that have to deal with this .. ick well i know part of growning up but why so young . oldest was 12 i mean like 12 birthday poor child happy period day ick ! i wish i could save them for this . Dani youngest funny also wont people know ? will someone make fun of you .. how will you know whenyour getting it .. all the what if poor kid

Ever feel like i can not breath or i am drained

drained , lost falling cannot keep up . this month is crazy why i don't know
here a quick list
confirmation
out of town three days a week (*last )
1st Communion
Halloween birthday party girls
fundraiser dinner
3 trainings
this is just example of my month just this week
was Randi birthday and dinner out , today Monday
conference 2 Tuesday
work book fair Thursday
softball party wed
home coming nik Friday (mean i need to get her there and back plus friends plus all that goes into going to home coming . making shirt , pants , hang ing with friends to do this and money
confirmation pictures and all that goes with clothes , party etc Saturday
then confirmation and party at my house then guess what i get to wake and start week over
yeah hello i work 50 hours a week and do all cleaning , cooking ,shopping etc aah
then it the next week
my kids wonder why i have to say no . just don't have that many hours in any day or energy .
who does i feel bad
don't get me wrong i would not change a thing just don't know how to keep up .


OK enough of that vent
how about shopping for dress clothes with a 15 yr old girls really i am not sure who worst guys or gals as i have one of each but she really needs dress clothes in her closet ? well we got a sweater and black pants that it so this does not work really for this week end when she need some . she can not wear pants under gown for confirmation but by the time i was done tonight i did not care if she wears basketball shorts ! and really she can no one will know or see but a cute little black shirt be cute but nope !

Randi is ten today wow she in 5Th grade and can not believe how she wants to grow up and how fast kids do . she very little small and no where ready for puberty which i am OK with . she wonders why some at her grade do and she not . well first she a good year or two behide other as she skipped a grade plus she just not ready . i know i wanted to grow up fast when i was a preteen and wish i did not ., i was not ready to grow up . why do we do that ?
well i am tired just need to get it all out and maybe i can think better tomorrow .

Mothers how busy are we lol

Really Oct for us should not be crazy softball done right wrong !
first week Friday we are out of town for week end , then first week we have conferences and book fair school stuff . then next week home coming , Nicole confirmation . then we have girls Halloween/ birthday party's . lets see we also have a fundraiser dinner where i need to make baskets for auction and see what else i need to do for it . then next week Halloween and then Randi first commune serous where all this crap come from . oh yeah i love Halloween so i love to deco and plan girls costumes and party but really i need to get through one week at a time . of course works busy , and normal every day life shopping and cleaning hard enough . this all mean shopping for clothes for girls , food and cooking of course cleaning . shopping and get stuff Halloween birthday party . i sometimes feel there just is not enough time in a day to make it . if i could have one wish i want more time so i can feel i get stuff accomplished . The big question is it time ? or something else like ?

Why can't we have a perfect world for our kids

Heart Breaks ! my son having issues with his room mate he told me today his room mate hates him .(makes me want to cry ) i thought they where great roommates now one hates him . they will be together for next two years in same programs and same classes . they wont have to room next next year together . he seems so nice when we moved in and so does did his mom . i hope they make it livable for the next semester and 1/2 . i want that prefect world for my kids and them not have to see the ugly of the world .

How i love my kids (children ) but some time you can not take there pain way

These are little pain this week but still hurts a mom the same as big pain . oldest daughter sick , you worry never know . youngest struggling with school and i want to save her , blame the teacher she had last two year . she not struggling like cannot do the work but it so much and her immature nature comes out .oldest so well working there school on new level , leveling at new lever l . by the way i am much more at easy these days my anxiety is not to bad . just try not to think to much lol you know you just want them all to be happy , finds happy and have a better life then i have ?? to much to ask (ohyah not that my life hard or anything ) i believe i am truly blessed with a good husband , home ,job and healthy kids . so home much more can i need or want .
but to watch any hurt it hurts we can not always fix the issue or even some times make it easy . sometimes they will need to live thought it all .
i am very proud of all my children also so anything to be blessed .

I was just thinking how did i want to raise my children

i have thought of this many times over the years . what important things i wanted to give my children , things like working together , family first , well god then family . your sibling will always be there but mom , dad and friends might not be . team work as a family , helping around the house , family time important i try to always have dinner as a family matter what we are all doing teens needs to be home at 530 to eat with us . we do movie night and game night where we focus on just the kids .
now dont get me wrong my kids i think are a little over spent on , all play sports . i wonder tho what have i taught my kids about money and what important in live . if ask one of my 9 yr old she going to buy her kids tons and everything . ask my 15 yr old daughter she would never buy new cars , never pay for private school for her kids (she thinks i will ha not !) see that in writing .
my son he follow his dreams , Passion and love so i say good for him , no he will never be rich as a police officer . but if it makes him happy more power to him . my baby child say she going to stay in our house and we are going to move out . (possible not a bad idea in 20 yrs she be 29 then she could buy it from us ) possible we will see .
i hope they are all happy and find things that bring them happiness and i taught them money does not always . i want to them all to be self supporting and just know truly what important in life and it not that new pair of 100 shoes or new car make you better .
love peace and happiness

First day of school last day of summer it seems

Are you sad Summer coming to End !?

i know possible a bad mom but i am happy for everyone getting back to school and routines . i love routine i am a routine person and planner and i think school good for kids .and mom hehe . i think they are sot of excited . oldest started Tuesday and girls start next Tuesday . i am counting the days no school age in childcare . My day will become easier . i love them to death but it not my reason staying in childcare i stay in childcare because i like my job and i make good money . i do think the kids need more more the older they are them when preschoolers . so i would not change my job There is huge draw back doing childcare and having kids . i am excited all school supplies are bought , shoes and clothes and open house done . we are all set . so what to do for our last week end (we also have no softball ) i think Dh working part of it tho . i really need a whole day to clean and a whole day to my self and a whole to do something fun with the girls so we will see if i can plan it all out and everyone get what they need .

ok so i know how to get my son to email me back

i email on Sunday night to see how is week end going ect
then no answer so i email him today and told him i have a new phone for him and guess what i got email from him right back lol . it work to know if he was ok
so i have anxiety each week end he gone . i keep thinking maybe we did not expose him to enough . i know we have taught him are values and morals . talked about sex and drugs , peer pressure what the risk are, now have to let go and let him fly ..
oldest daughter started school today i think it went good . i can not wait for the other two start next Tuesday . yahoo ......two down two to go . a little sad my babies are getting old 9 now and going into 4 th and 5th grade other two are a 10th grader and a son in college . i am really not that old you know can not be .

ok life with 4 kids

first tonight started off slow no kids home . still getting used to oldest being gone. i think he a little home sick i am sure it not us but his friends and surety of home and mom and dad . but i was good and did not say you come home this week end . i just said i see you need week end . but it was hard .
so hubby and i go to dinner and get home hang a little and then get a call the girls are at a sleep over and Randi calls and say danni got something stuck on her figure and they can not get it off . ok so them we get a 2nd call she still can not get it off and now was through up twice . ok so we are on our way now . get there it is off why kids do things like this and she find and now wants to stay and by the way like 8 of the 10 girls crying for her . my two scared to death .. danni has through up before being scared and in pain .
then so on our way home pick up our teen nik at a friends house all home well us three soundly for the night .9where these day to only have three or 4 of us here )
it getting weird around here they are so all more dependent and how they dont need us as much . iam very independent but i am actual trying to be a little more dependent on my family , hubby ect not sure i am like it that much . so it will be an interest few years .
i know many have trouble with marriages when kids are first born ect but for us that was so long ago and i think we had a little rough patch after are 2nd but when the girls came we where so busy they did not have time . something did change when our family grow , i wont say bad but but changed . as i think we are going though a change now as one has left other three getting older .
i am a little confused i like doing my own things and having my own life but i also very involved with our kids life like 5 to 6 night a week , i love my job but i also love my husband so i am trying to sort through all that to and where it all fits in . i hate women that there whole life has to revolve and need their husband for there own happiness and entertainment . so working on a good balance as the kids dont need us as much one one daily needs .

Ok this first week i am starting to worry

my anxiety taking over a little so no i am not doing ok . so Friday he wrote (email me and we talked back and forth ) then not much over week end maybe a quick word or two once then Monday i email to ask about how first real day went and a few questions and i got three words back . then i email again i got a few more words . then today nothing to my question . it hard i am trying not to call or text . and i am hoping he not doing the worst drinking , parting or anything bad happened .
i am trying not to be like my mom i remember at 18 when i moved out she keep asking me when i am coming back .. i dont want to be that person but i just want to remind him to make right choices and get a long . ( i know it sound like he three but real still need this in adulthood . )
well three girls doing well my middle daughter want a pet for her birthday . hum no i dont like pets . now her take is if i can not have a pet for my birthday then i dont want anything ! well i want to say i think i actual said that easy and walked away . i know sound mean but this is my very gift child that has some issue sometimes . so we will see her birthday is not for another 5 weeks


ok i am editing to say i did get email from him last night with about three lines it hard not be able to see him , look him in the eyes and see physical what going on . si i know he a live so i am a little happier . still hard .

Ok first week fears

Here was a little advice my husban gave our son was he walked out the do to move to college , college is about good grades and condoms (oh my ) . also was they walk his to his new room at college house manager like i am here to control fights and watch the drinking . (i am not sure my son even took a drink ) i am not worry he will or he will drive but i am worry about pressure to drink to much . you hear this story . is he saver he is in the law program and they can be kicked out if get in trouble .my husban also told him to make us proud . i know he will(i hope)
what about his girls friend we had a talk knowing a long distant relationship might not last as she here in high school and your so far away busy with your new life . he does understand that to . ok so i worried last night knowing it was a friday night and they are lose on there own a bunch of 18 yr most for the first time away from home .
on good notes is he likes his roomates . things are falling into place mostly . he forgot the right kind of shirt tho for uniform so he had to go buy a few until he gets home . i might send a package to him monday shirts and his old phone as his is not working . other good things he get to drop a three credit class as he already has the college credit for it beside his 19 credit load just got lighter . he will also save over $500 this semster which is wonderful as we are on a tight budget and i just dont want him to grad with tons of bills .

Ok my Baby Boy is off at school living now over 200 miles away

Only girls home now . i did good did not cry at all . i am worried but i am more worried about the drive back and forth for him around 450 miles round trip on the week ends he comes home exceptional in winter and his new smaller car . i think i prepared my self the last few month like not waiting up for him when he out . of course he still had a cure few but i did wait up to make sure he was home . knowing it only a month and he is on his own . i think everyone should live through it . this first week -end i am sure hard but after class start Monday he be good . i got email and he said he lives his roommates so that a great side . i found and keep thinking to my self this was easier then dropping him off to leave for over sea in the army what he wanted to do . for you that don't know i asked him to go to school for two years first . i am not sure i was right but i felt at 16 ,17 or even 18 he not mature enough to understand what goes on over there . i under stand his point and why . i also think at 20 or sometime after he will still join and i will support him and stand with him . i just don't want my baby over there right now . sorry if some might feel that was wrong .

Are baby is 9 today wow !

these years go really fast i can not belive it has been nine years . we was are 4th an last and we know it and she does to . so she really truly is our baby but she lovely , kind , caring sweet and fun to be around with and really cute !
she got a new ipod bigger one for her birthday today and a shirt i am taking her to Alains for dinner with her other 9yr old sister . my son with girls friend before he leave , other dd and dh are at softball but grandma and other grandma are meeting us there . it been fun . i baked a cake today for her Before she woke her sister deco for her birthday so that was sweet and went yesterday to dallor store to get her something .
where does the time do i remember how hard it was when she was little and her sister was a baby but i loved these day s
Well happy birthday Dani !

well all well week end

nothing exciting here low keep laid back . this week is crazy i actual only working 2 1/2 days and one full . so it will be crazy and fast . son girls friend here today so i am tired to the house it a little weird now that all the kids are ages that can be left alone for a few then now we add girls here and nope tired to house again watching kids lol i would not have it any other way but i feel lost some of my few well .
i am looking forward to my son living on his own and learning hum home not so bad , always clean towels , food to eat and clean bathroom lol maybe he care maybe not . i know biggest for me was i messed the food .
will it be different with just three girls at home (ok i could cry ) not really as he is the oldest , a boy and done with most sports he is on his own a lot and not with us so we will see . it be weird tho just knowing he is not here !

so i am so excited in a way for my son to leave the nest

So last year after college started i picked up all new bedding , bath stuff like towels shower curtaining , and a few other things . plus yesterday i took him to pick up a few dishes , cleaning supplies and stuff he might need . he so unexcited! boo so i don't care and i don't have time for this . my oldest daughter so looking for this and him care less . a little disappointed . i did ask if he wants me to move him up there and he was yes so that good at least i get to come and help move him in . he a very low maintains kid . except for video games you know .
i am sure it will be a shock one day and he wakes and does not have a bowl to eat his cereal out of or nothing to drink it sure not going to be like moms home lol . it a right of passing for all i do remember not sure anyone was helping me find pans, pots ect i cannot wait until he eat mac and cheese and Romain noodles fro a week straight . i did many times . he will leave like we all did .

well it been a while again

I lost net for around 5 days . wow how out of touch i felt so weird . i did try to embrace it tho and see net not really good for the family as it take away from family time . we all could sit in different rooms and talk to other and not each other . so i try to use that time . oh yah you think i have a clean house but nope not at all i think it is messing then when we have computer working lol

count down son leaves in 6 days i will drop him off at college . well really not dropping but i will go up and help move him in and if want help him get settle . i hope i be able to leave and not cry 3 1/2 hour all the way home . you know some time my anxiety not always in check and i worry about dumb dumb things lol like will he get up for class , does he need a toaster , will he have enough money to live and pay for school . dumb dumb it will all work out . will he get up for class , will he do his home work ... crazy stuff cool
i was told i be ready for him to leave and i feeling i am like he driving me crazy with some stuff he doing , late hours hang-out with friends and girl friend, i trying to be understanding as his last days living down here full time . well i am sure i just looking for stuff to push him away and hopeful he grow and make good choose this is the real test on our parenting . scared the crap out of me .

ok a little weird

so my son gone until Saturday . oldest daughter gone up at a friends cabin and girls where at a friends house . so after work for a minute i was know ones mom here weird . they where all gone .
it was like what do it do . i mean i have been home alone before and it always weird . i have another 10 yrs before all are on there own somewhat but wow
husband and i just decide recently to work on our marriage a little we will see . it weird or wounder what will be are purpose if we are not parenting someone . i am not sure i will do with out them . i mean i have been parenting for 18 yrs already and then we have another 10 yrs before our youngest leaves so that hum 28 of parenting someone in our home . am i even that old ?
i have friends, things i like to do , things to keep me busy and i love my job so i am sure i will fig what to do with my time but will it be lonely at first ? well i guess in 10 yrs i could be a grandma (omg ) my son will 28 by them and dd 25 i hope not really but if so then it will be . i am hoping my children have children later and start a career they love first . get set in light and be ready for all live has to toss there way . i would never change when , how many or anything about my kids . but i thought i knew the world and i will have to worker harder then if i might of been older . who knows tho . i am greatful for everything my life , job and family .

ok it been a few days again

Drop son off at Fort Ripley Sunday night for the week . i know he;s a big boy and will love it to hate it he will physical , metal and educated this week in state patrol . he then will be home for hum around 10 days then leaves for college . i never know this would be hard. i wounder now how my mom felt when i left home at 18she always thought i would come home and kind of keep asking when you coming home but i did not return for any thing but vacation until i was 22 then i moved in for 4 month while i had my son. it like a piece is leaving and i Carnot not keep him safe anymore . he was to grow up . is he ready ?

oldest daughter dating wanting to bring a boy home for us to meet . ick i am not ready , she also should be driving by the end of the week . wow where has all this time gone

my baby will be 9 this month it does not seem that long ago . i am said a little none are little all growing up and our house is changing by the day . the girls are getting ready to go into 4Th and 5Th grade it remember them starting preschool on the bus like yesterday .

my wall i hit seem to be going but it will take work so i am feel well there . money suck as i am worried with private school , college ,3rd car and all . everyone keeps telling me all they need or want and my head spins a little . it will all work out i know and well if it dont we will eat and have a house so we will fig it all out .

well i have not posted in a while as i am not in a great place

i feel i have hit a wall and i need to fix it .
i am grateful for my family , my job everything around me . i need to fix somethings . i dint want to get into but i took stand and i moving forward with out knowing the out come.
my son i have him for about three more weeks at home but one he gone at state protol boot camp . then home a week then off to school . i am a little stress what happen he hate it , can not handle being adult i could i fail out of college at 18 boohoo and took years of going to school and final finishing at 38. i know he not me but he not a strong student and likes to just get by . then the stress of paying for it all omg stress me out .
oldest dd i was worry she want to date omg can i pick the guy i promise i wont pick the nerd !
Girls one never want to grow up other want to shave legs and grow up to fast .
about a month before school starts it will go fast summer always does . we made all the appointments eye , teeth and checks up. you know how many that is x 4 and always someone else go to go back to dentist for something or extra shoot . i am very grateful i can take them all and pay for it .
i am hoping to do a few family things before summer ends as a family that has nothing to do with our children sports a little balance would be great . skiing ,taking boat out , up north for the week end , valley fair

so my vacation has change

we where all head to Kansas well dh , me and three girls for a national softball tourament which we did last year . and guess what the little girls and i have to stay . i was looking forward to a week vacation different state spending it with another 30 families from our softball teams . boohoo
i am starting to feel a little better but i am sure sunday night when my oldest dd leave and dh i will be a bitch ! i feel left out .i will have fun i am still taking off , i am going to plan on cleaning some big project 9oh yah fun vacation ) also take girls to a fair , possible swimming one day and then they play games on thur- sun and then dh and dd will be home . oh yah dh 40th birthday on sat . ok i want to cry again . no no i hate i feel like this a kid being left out .
i think i forgot to ad why we are staying as girls made there own national right here in mn white bear lol so much for vacation .
well i am going to try to enjoy my family this week end while all here oldest of course plays ball then they head out.

another week end

wow of course a softball week end my little girls played 6 games ,4 today . it so hard as a mom watch them struggle or lose when they try so hard . R is a pictcher she did great but did not have it in after 7 hours of playing to pull it out of her. of course she never lose a game her self or anyone one player lose a game all by self . i am proud tho they played a great season we did place 4 th at 10u in state and have a chance to go to national (hehe just in white bear ) but they as a team have done wonderful
well we are just tired and now we get ready for a crazy week of softball and then off to kanas for a week of softball ,our crazy life of softball ......

so i have not wrote for a few days

We where out of town for the 4th doing what else softball had a fun time
i am still in my funk about what my life has become but wont talk about that today
let see my son my baby boy 18 i can not be old enough to have 18 it really does not seem like i could be possible as i have a 8 and 9 yr . he a great kid , leaving for college , has a girls friend and know what he doing in life ..
oldest dd driving me crazy this summer of course and needs to start drivers ed ick she kind of a air head so i am worreid about her driving lol
girls they good i am sure borad but we leave for KS in a week so that be fun but for what else softball lol
dh and have been married 16 yrs friday hum wonder if we will do anything
i have know my dh 21 yr not possible 16 yr married that crazy ( that seems like a life time )
does all this mean i am grown up in a grown up world
so days i dont think i want to be

Do you ever wish you could change places with your husban

take his job for a week and he do yours and the million other things you have to do ? maybe it me i have resented many many things in my marriage and try to see it his way . But some time i want to explored !! i finish later have to go!
ok i am feeling better hehe but i still love my husband actual i think all husband should do what we do for a week 100% of all we do . i know i am not discounting what dh does but i am sure i do way more then he does and his parts is easier then mine . i think my is harder as i do home childcare so my job never seems it ends and i am with our children 24/7 plus house work ect never seems a break! i love to give him a list all the stuff i do in a day and see if he can get it done plus watch ten kids and care for them in a day . i fond that all funny actual .
i am also a little resentful that i have put my self last . i always though of my self as selfish in my younger days i was not going to have kids and ended with four and i actual would of had more if the world was not like it was and of course i could afford more something change during the way and i would never never change a thing but as a mom we let are self go and put my children first as it should be but at what risk ?i hope i did not make to many mist acts along the way .

So it Friday

no relax here always on go and if we where not so much would have to be done here around the house . little girls have a softball tournament in EP starting at 8am tomorrow so have to be there by 7am ick i hate these games and times lol
still need to get DS a car as we are jugging three drives with two cars ahh frustrating .i plan dh (smile ) he no help . he going to sneak in work this week end but it will be nice it wil pay for our trip next week end to SD .or at least most be nice .
well nothing really to say . hope all have a safe and happy week end

so over the years i have to wonder why we are here and live this long

so my neighbor died yesterday she been sick battling with cancer . they and really our neighbors took my kids under there wings as we where the next generation to move into this neighbor . they all built this home , raised there familiy and now living as grandparents ect . well i know mu neighbor sue was younger o around my parents age as her kids where younger them me and my husban . so she had a wondewrful life raised 4 kids also went to smae private school my dd goes , has grandchildren , just left her job after hum 30 yrs ect , built there dream home on the lake , and then hit with the Big C , so left changed and she lost the fight .but it makes me wonder what is are life all about i had another good family friend her dh die years ago around the time the where jsut getting ready to retire and enjoy life together . also look at my Father in law life change for them the day he had his major stroke .
there is a point to this as a couple i always say we will have time for each other or self ect when our kids are grown but what happens if life has a different plan . and that time never comes ? i mean i am glad all these people and my self is well and alive to care for my children and family .watch and see them grow. i am there for them . but what happens if our time or mine time never comes . why we work so hard and then dont get to enjoy it when i am 55 or 65 . i am sorry a little sad.
As my friends still fighting with her little girls that sick and hanging onto life she is doing better but why did this hit this family ?

Well i lived throught the week end and our crazy life

so we had 11 softball games , a ride a lone, twice at the fair and many eating outs ! All to start over this week-end but this time only my little ones play and son has something Friday but not sure what .. and i am sure oldest daughter will want plans actual i think she wants a party friday night so we will see .
i am frustrated with my son and lack of job i try to be understanding but it almost July n no job .. please just get something to make spending money . i try to make it hard for him and not give him money so he more motivate to get a job but does not seem to work . i do think he is as frustrated as me but i still don't feel he gives 100% . i want every day three app turn in talking to people . he does maybe three a week am i to hard ? then the guilty me comes in ..
then my middle daughter she going to be the live of me she talks back act out scream and shoots ahh it going to be a long summer and fight with sister and lies , say things behind my back .. what to do !!!
so that where i am at today .
i have a friend and her daughter very sick she has an aneurysm in her brain and had to cut her skull open she i believe 6 so i am praying for a fast recovery and trying to be grateful for my healthy children i want to scream at ..

our week end in this life

So tonight starts with two at practice , then usally out to dinner , one on ride a lone until midnight (which i cannot sleep until all my kids are home ) and other need to be pick up at 10pm not her choice mine from fair . tomorrow 5 of us leave by 6am husban and i two different dictions hour 11/2 way from each other . 6 softball games for three girls on sat , Sat my son has to work a men softball tourament also here in the city we live in . then sunday repeat . oh yah it fathers day possible will see dh dad for dinner if we have time or are done .
so my week end filled with making sure cooler fill , sunscreen on the girls , giving them water and making sure they are eatting . and a whole lot of driving .
have a good one all . enjoy

I have not posted in a few days as i have been in a mood

So i did not think everyone else need to hear me whine it been a up and down week . Frustrating week with the car for me or my son . with the news laws it making it impossible to buy a car with out prefect credit if you are self employed very frustrating . i thought i was doing right thing about driving my van to the ground . mistake. i thought it was a good idea to go 5 yrs no payment nope . i am sure it all will work out and son will leave with a car and i keep my van and lets just pray they dont brake down .. and if they do we can afford to get them fix.
my goal this year was to pay down dept .. why is it so so hard and never works like i want and some how end up with more .
i read things like a family of 5 make and lives on 30,000 a year i dont understand are they smarter with there money , never income dept ? i cannot live on 100 grand a year . we dont have or do exspeive things . we do have proity with our money private school , help ds with college ect kids sports fees and camps . if i where to cut all this out lets see how much money we have about 15,000 grand more a year and starting next year about 20,000 some people only make that in a year (i did years ago )well enough of this depressing stuff .

Do you ever think i should be worring about things

like swine flu or hungry at your children school or in your neighbor hood . i mean i do worry about this but i feel so over whelm with the world i live in i am not sure i could or should do anymore .
here a topical week for me
i work 7am to 5 pm mon thru Friday
sat and Sunday this week coming i will have three kids playing softball with 6 games each team meaning 12 games or as many as one of us can get to .
Monday well i have to run to car place hopeful find something way home from there store and return something at target and grab floor cleaner . then hit cub for food for the week hopeful home by 10pm
Tuesday girls 2 have practice then run from there to oldest dd game
wed girls have game
Thursday all three have practice
i think i am off Friday night so i hit the bank , finish food shopping , drive dd somewhere then pick up again before bed . then the week end start
so ok this is my life i don't mind it except you should see the wash that need to be put away , or how tired i am and don't want to clean extra room , garage ect when i have a night off .. barely can get floors and bathrooms done . so back to the point where and how do i worry about bigger things then me . i actual don't think are bigger them us your self and i think we can make a differences and change things , or help but where does that fit into my life this time of my life anyway ?
i mean i feel i do give in my life to little life's each day and many families but is that enough , i worked an out reach neighborhood program for a few years but had to give it up . taught Sunday school . But if i could have ideal job i would be giving more time and working with more need youths then i do now but i have to support my family . makes me wondering

i feel a little more relaxed today

i am still thinking i am making wrong choice on my car but i do like it will love it as long as the payment are where i want , and it holds up .. all if when you buy used
my son is dating he never been a dater all through high school his friends where more cool and i was ok with that but now he going to college and be 18 in in less then a month all gaga over this girls (good thing she leaving for a month to visit day in cali i believe )
kids home for summer what to do them son will have a job i hope and be going to school , my oldest dd need to help around her i want her in some routine so she dont lay around until she goes to friends house or softball. she also need to take driver ed icks she my Blondie really not sure about her some times .
little ones will just drive me crazy with other school agers i have for summer .
so we will see
i like the two olders ones chore each day like unload dish washer , wash towels , we wash towels every day 6 of use . see if what else i can ad that she dont already do , she does room , her own wash , bathroom trash and wipe up stair bathroom down . but more then doing them i want some rout ion for her drives me nuts her sitting around all day texting . so we will see it only been three days and she already dring me nuts woundering around

do you ever feel you are doing to much ?

i think i could name 101 things i try to do each day from mopping the floor to buying a car . i kind of feel i have a lot of changes going on in my life , not sure why i have had more at once like buying house , new job and getting married all with in 6 month talk about stress .
so i am trying to buy a new car or new to me as i want to give my son our van to take to college . but i hate it all i think i pin it down to three but my family no help . kids dont want another van they say no way , dh say buy want you want and well me i am a mess . do i buy what i want i think it the worst buy out of three . it the most money , most miles and no warranty as other are cheaper , cleaner , lower miles . my head spinning . i hate all these things really . never know if it the right choice , good choice , smart choice . plus let not even talk money as lets see i pay 500 to dd school each month and i am adding another 500 month bill for ds college and lets see add another 500 car payment holly cow . plus the million of bills i have now , high morage ,high credit bills and another truck payment ,just want me to run . ok not really but would love to get it under control and i am not sure how to
well ds made it home all ready for school sign up ect , also got in mail today a cadet program for state patrol he going to this aug . he was excepted . yah scary tho i think they will kick his butt there .good for him but as he my baby boy i worry if he can handle the pressure .
well i go to bed with my head spinning and see what happens tomorrow

OK it is starting to hit me and my son left for the first time today

to make his first of many trips to school and back 3 1/2hours way on his own . My heart hurts in worry , a little sad he grown up . some how i though something magic would happen when he graduated and my job (i mean i not disowning him or kicking him out) or anything but i would stop worrying , not stop caring . i really could cry for sadden that he is grown . leaving the nest and worried about all the what ifs . i hate this .
i think of my self strong mom and woman but then yesterday i was thinking on the graduation was easy no tear it will be hard when he graduates from college and academy . right well it starting now . i am hoping it will get easier .
I do have faith and need to let my son go and fly on his own . my kids teen exspacal i tell them i will give you enough to hang you and bring you back in . But now that he is adult well in a month and in college ( the college told me today he had to get is info as once register at college he is consider an adult (well!) slap in face lol . i might not be able to also there to loosen the rope to help them .
i also thought it be harder to let my daughter go .
well i feel better and i am proud to start this new chapter in both of our life's . please hug your little boys tonight as my is a man and will not be there each night to hug.

well we all live throught it all

so i did not run out of food . did forget to take pictures ok how bad is that . we had a good turn out with the weather , everyone stayed dry but it was cold i would say like 75 people or so so a little less then normal it would be if it was sunny and warm . so i have food still for like 50 more people lol
non one fought that good . many police office came by and gave him money which i would think just stop eat wish him best wishes would of been enough horror i think so it was really nice . neighbors people think why all these cops at Roger's house lol . for you dont know my son is an explorer and works with our local police dept here for the last two years and is going into officer program in the fall . (not sure how we got a kid that wants to be a cop ) but i am proud ! i was not a great teen and was far from the law .. i am sure may e we did something right as a parent some where .
so now he has this money , what to do ? of course he want to take like 300 bucks and use it for a toy but i say that pays for books , uniforms for school food ect . this is hard something i been thinking about how to teach my kids about money . (this should be another post maybe later )
so how do you teach your children money responsibility ? he will need to manage his money for school , food , gas , and spending (he wants to spend i believe ?) he usually not like this but he think it his money it is but it also got a load of bills for college so how do i help him ? we are helping him pay for school my goal would be he get through two years with out loans but i am not sure i am worried that means like 500 a month or more for us extra which is manageable i guess but i want him responsible also fore this . i talk more another night about money management another post , when kids where little they have saving , spending and long term or charity. but now saving is more and spending more .
what to do i think he mad which makes me pissed that he can not take like 400 and blow it , i feel guilty why do we do that , i gave him a party , lap top , paying for school , he has the latest or sort of games ect he one of these kids and always been it never enough how do we teach him this , oh yah i am giving him my car . by the way he does not have a job .you see this is a sore spot for me . it not that he has not tyred to get a job but i feel he should keep trying , just if you fill out one job app does not make it you looking for work . Then i do this flip and he going to school this summer three morning , drives sisters around , does what we ask so it hard . one side side say maybe i should pay him to help with his sister but then again that kind of payment for the car , other side say he should have a job saving for college . parent tug away

why does family invites bring he best of us out

my husband would
say the worst time in our marriage would be when we where planning our wedding . that when we fought the most and was the most stressful . (by the way we where also buying a house and i started a new manager job ) 3 things they say are the most stressful .
any way planning a graduation party for a few 100 of your closest friends and family is like planning a small wedding .
Why do men think they can start getting ready for it 24 hours before hand while women plan for weeks or months before and plan and prepare .
now the rain mind you we have a huge three car garage and he decide somewhere he was not going to use it and we just do it out side . i have a great big , shady yard , huge kitchen to work for food . but now what RAIN , what to do with your few 100 guest if all come at once OMG i want to cry and keep thinking it wont rain will it ?
we will see as i am keep moving forward doing what i plan and hope it all works out (well how cannot it work out ) it what it is right ?
His bright idea at 6am this morning on his way to softball with oldest DD is to rent a uhaul for the day . unload crap in there and then reload by in garage . omg that sound a little crazy but could work . if he would of planned months ago he could of had it done already .
well my yard looks nice . i mess up and did not get the carpets clean and well ick i see white spot where i spot clean ick oh well life will go on.. have i said i am not doing this a gain girls all out of luck . just kidding but i will never plan my own wedding again would not do that again . i said that and mean that .

i have always felt bad about feeling like one child gets more from us then another and how to balance 4 child. when son came of co use he was are only child and he came with special needs so for about the first 10 years even after dd came he was are focus we spent a lot of time and attain . then dd got older and seem to need us more with school and sports friends girls things . then the little girls came and well they needed a lot but still a lot of attain to oldest dd with her sports ect . son seem to be doing good but felt like he need more . when all where little i would try to take each one out once a month so one a week just with mom to dinner , movie or shopping and dd would do the same with our son one on one time . our daughter also seem to need us now more . and our son off doing his thing with him self or friends and i wonder if we missed something . i sure hope not . it a balancing act with 4 kids let me tell you . i want them all to feel special , love and number 1 with mom and dad .

Do you think we are doing to much for our children

when my children where little i always thought i was teaching them Independence but now as i have one leaving for college and another in high school . i wonder but my girls are 8 and 9 and look at them and dont want them to grow up so fast .want them to be kids and school there work . i mean they always have chores and things they help with , excepted to get good grade do home work , go to church , play sport ect . my oldest two do own wash , little ones put there away ,make there bed , help put dish away . As i look at my son i wonder is he ready to live on own (he can cook and shop) we tested this last year when we left him home for a week with money to buy own food and gas for the week . he say he ready . is it my anxiety as a mom ? part of this is coming from when i went to college i did it all on my own at 18 i march into the school applied , applied for aid ,filled out all paper work ect . my son on the other hand i did it all . he is going up to registration himself in a week he asked if i was coming i say no .. you can do it . they help him but if i could do it on line i would have have for him . is that wrong to want to be there for him ,help him on his way if he needs it ?it scary now i might see the mistake we made as parents now that our children are being adults .or i am hoping to see the good things we did do in them as they are adults .

seriously husbans

seriously i know this is about being a mom into world for me but i have to wonder how marriage is different them our parents or grandparents
First i have to get my vent out . i know my dh is working two job right now but really i work 50 hours a week ever week of the year or at least 50 , i do wash for me and two of the kids , all towels , blankets ect each week , all shopping , all bills and running a family stuff , 99.9 % house work . and lets see dog out of food (i did not know and i took two kids after i got off work to softball 45 minutes away got home at 9:30 . now i know he work 11 or 12 hours today but you think he stop and get the dog food as he knew i was out a ball field and have no time . and another thing he came down to get something and sit and watch tv in kitchen (this makes me lol ) leave the tv on hello he been doing this for a while now why no one in the freaken room . i just dont understand . if i did not have two tired , hungry dirty girls with me i would of stooped but instead dog at cereal tonight .
i have to give dh he is a great dad , always there for them , help tons when babies where babies hands on dad and all .but i have notice longer we are married 16 yrs he gets worst at this stuff . here another funny in our married so when we are home and say 5:30 rolls around and he notice i have not started dinner he will start to cook or say did you have anything planned then cook but if i am cooking it hands off . does not even think about it .
my mom waited on us kids and my dad hand and foot and worked full time . i said i would never do that and i dont but i wanted things more 50/50 is that wrong ? i do work from home so i can do more stuff and my job not really physical so am not saying 50 /50 have to be but 25/75 could be nice 80/20 lol . what you think? what your married like has it changed over the years . when we where first maaried and for the first few years i actual seen him clean the floor , bathroom , kitchen .now i am not sure he know where the mop is . how did this happen just easier for me to take over ? now i am stressing as 100 of his family and closest friends coming to our son graduation party and well a lot neeeds to be done before sat .
i could vent on but i wont we all not prefect i know i am not . and he never says a word about anything i do or dont do

when does your job stop as a mom

what does it cover . ok this week-end crazy no crazy then most for us . as dh says it our life that what it is . we had 9 softball games , (could been 11) 2 weddings , banquet dinner . so my mind is busy on graduation stuff , work and doing what i have to do . so i did not keep track off much else like the banquet dinner as i was not going only oldest dd and dh . well guess what they asked what time ? hum 6 or 6:30 where? i dont know as i toss it out of my mind once i knew i did not need to worry about it . then felt bad as they got to where they thought and was not there . how i am i to know ? my brain on over load trying to keep all 4 kids and our life on track ,we dont have night or day free in june and i am sure july almost as bad . i usally more then one kid has something . it makes my head tired . now i would not change it but i can not remember everythng .
i keep three calendars one for work , one for softball and one for all others things ..
one of these mommy choices that are hard so my youngest dd has a play should of been friday but changes now to tuesday . but my ds oldest has a thing at the college that will only happen once . so what do you do . so sad everyone needs me . i whant to be there for both of them . my youngest up set i have not even told oldest . so i got it worked out the best i can i am going during the day (costing me 39 bucks ) to take off but then can go to ds at night . my mom and possible dh go to youngest play . now i know why my mom had only one child at a time .. i hate these things . my girls are always like are you coming to the game it not that i dont go to a million games or even want to but some times another child needs me . the heart ach of a parent goes on

Do we ever stop worring about our children

I worry more now the older i am or could be the older my children get . i don't think my anxiety with my children was worst when i was younger and they where young .. maybe cause i could keep them close and safe . and now they leave and are on their own more .. i Am thankful and blessed but i worry .. My son tells me it is going to be OK .... i worry my children will be safe if some one gangs up on son , car accident , will my son be able to do college .. I am I a good enough parent these kind of these . are we parenting wrong ? will someone hurt one of my daughters .. It can drive me crazy at time thinking all my anxiety about my kids ..
i feel there problems are bigger and i can not fix them always . some teen just have to work issues out .. heart hurts and all .. i have gone to bed crying for my kids as i can not fix there pain .. nothing hurts more . i sometime wounder if my parents did ? i sure dont remember them hurting when i hurt or showing it . worring about me . i believe they did . did it hurt as much as i do ? it funny tho thinking of my parents i caused their pain and worry . my kids dont do anything that cause it . they are all good kids , good valuses , moral , work hard , have good friends and good goals. so why worry so much it hurts .

sports parents

Do sports keep kids out of trouble ? do they balance children life ? do they make them disciplined? motivated , over works, competition ? or does it cause stress , perfection , to much pressure ? i try really hard to balance my kids life with family , church , school ,sports and friends . i have two very perfectest children and i worried about the being prefect , they get prefect grades , have to be best at everything , both play a position that can win or lose a game .practice practice and practice to be that prefect pitcher .. it it all to much ..
another thought also do we spend to much on it ? my girls do clinics , camps own there own equipment ect ? where the line .. is there one ?
out of the next 30 days i only looked at June we have 5 nights , or days that don't have someone playing softball ... next year can be worst as we could have three playing on 3 different teams ..
we don't do any of these to make them better then anyone else , we don't do it to really make them better and would never do anything they did not want to do .. i have had long talks with my oldest daughter about if she ever want to quit i will support here .. would i be sad ? yes , would i think it was all worth it yes for sure , (1,000;s of dallors spent ) i think we fig last year how much we spent on softball one year on our oldest it was around 5,000 with out counting all the week end tournaments (that i am sure with out gas cost 100 or 150 plus usually two cars with a tank or two of gas och ......
why dont some parents let there kids play sports is it the kid or parents ? i have had friends so oh i forgot to sign them up . or how do you afford it .. it high on our list , we dont spend it at the bar (dont drink ) dont buy extra ,i drive older van ... cut other vacation out , dh cut fishing trips out .. kids first we only have them 18 years then we have to let them fly . as i am finding as my oldest leave for college in a few month (omg cry )
As a mom not a dad or coach i feel it should be fun , learning and teaching the kids the love of the game .. so it can be a life time of fun and playing . it does not matter what sport it is . but at time it heart breaking when they come from the field or car cryng ..feeling like they did not do good or blow the game . how do we handle this as a parent ,this is a life teaching moment.. do you cheer your team on even when it a bad game .
so when to much lets see we have i am sure 11 softball games friday , sat and sun this week end as all three girls are playing . we have 5 night off the whole month is that to much ? i am sure later tomorrow i will report more broken hearts or could be great cheer ..
we lost our first game today but my dd pitched a 4 pitch inning with 3 outs .. so that a good start but we lost ..

my son my only boy i can remember when he was born

it was 17 yrs (almost 18 yr ago ) he came three weeks early he was little had the skinniest legs even seen with huge feet on the end of them .. At about three months old we know something was different . the doctors said he had colic and he cried and cried . It funny how you forget these thing but not forgotten . He had many of these in his life . he's toddler years where hard he was busy very impulsive. example he broke his nose and got stitches in his Chin all in one week . they sent us to the special doc they said his Brain just goes faster then his body could go. did i say he was small . so small at like 10 he had a hand scan , brain scan and well million other test to see what size he will be when he grow up .. (he 5 10 now size 91/2 shoe) so not big but nothing wrong with size 150 lb. then we movies to school year . after first year of school we had him dio with fraser here where we started the label which i did not want to do . i felt like i was the worst parent in parent in the world. i failed , i did not know how to parent . school was rough . i never will forget the day the school suggest we might want to find him a different school so he could stop being bulling and he was not easy to handle either so hand in hand that would of been easy for the school . well he made it as he graduating next week and going to college .
He had (i say had as he might have some of these underlining issue but has learn to deal with out with out any meds or extra out side help .anxiety , ADHd , OCD hum i am sure there was a few other over time different doc label him .. he did many things over the years to combat his "issues " therapy , meds , diet . we worked allot on out parenting people ask (as i listen to other living this life ) will ask did therapy help at the time i would say no but looking back i am sure all the the outside help he got help him turn into the Young man he is today .. play therapy , sand therapy ,talk therapy . i was thinking what about how i explain how it helped this young child but the only way to explain it , it is someone that does not love them or hate them , is not Happy for them or anger at them .. it that person job . and what every they do or say i think in long run helped and made him the child he is today.. i feel i am blessed with him .. so far the first 18 yrs have been pretty good , even with the ups and down of our life ....

This is my life of 4

wow it been almost 18 years i have been a mom . my baby will be 18 in july . He's leaving for college in a few months . It can not be i am only like 28 right ?well not ! also have my first daughter me she a freshman going into 10th grade next year wow . Then my girls they are 10 months apart Cathlic twins . 8 and 9 now .. Been ,married to my husban for 16 yr. some days i think how did we get here . I am i living the american dream . 2 1/2 kids , dog and white fence .. is that what suppot to be ? i wonder some time .
My son he a great kid Avage student , a little unmotivated but know where he going and kind of who he is ..
my oldest daughter she a well round A student (little mommy brag 4.00) sport player , plays softball all year , made versity team this year and also for next year made cheer comp versity .(which she has declind and will play basketball instead )
my middle daughter very gift child , but at time hard to handle as she is so smart . also she want to grow up so fast , like share , wear a bra ,likes boys (make my head spin)she did skip a grade this year and still tested top of her next years class (another mommy brag )
my baby she 8 loving child with a temper . she just average also like my oldest but they are really easier to get a long with . easy going caring ..
so that my life
sorry for mommy brags as i am sure i forget to brag sometimes as i feel this jobs so hard and stressful that i forget .....
i am pround of each one of them and how thye are turning out . even when i am mad and scaird for them ..
i am blessed they are heathy , i think mostly happy as teens and preteen can be ..