where too start

i have so much to say but i wont board my self so i pick one point today to write about
i want to say i am thankful as i was driving home today from cub and reflexing on my life two house down moved out three months ago really no notice and now two house other side of me movied out really no notice these are owners not not renter this are families with 5 and 6 children . it makes me thankful and sad at same time . i am so so grateful i am no where losing ,my house . or my job !
now things have not been easy raising four kids one in college one in private high school and 2 younger ones while dh lost his business after 10 yrs .we have huge dept from the lost but i think positive and things will work out . on to positive note as i am thankful i am needing to move my family form there home , school and friends .
With this Christmas season coming on us i want my kids to be grateful as am for my life we live . do they know . i had a long time friend a friends i was friends with in grade school (that ages me ) tell me i went to visit her maybe 10 yr ago after not seeing or talking for about 20yr anyway she still lives in same small town we grow up . she said this is the poorest county in the state of California hum i did not know how poor i was . i am mean i know we did not have a lot of money i did not get everything i wanted and times where hard . we moved a ton when i was a kid but my . i possible felt a little different then other kids but that was because my family was different . i hope my children don't feel like that ever but i want them to be greatful for what they have .
i want them to remember this season it not what you want but what you have . i want them to remember there will always be other with more and lothers with less .... hard lesson to live with .

December

i have been busy focus on Christmas with my own family and childcare .
present i don't think my list is to long i do do my girls school staff . i do the childcare children , my parents and my brother but that it . then comes my four children . two still believe or want to believe in Santa . i try to do three gift from us (usually book and clothes when younger used to get pj to wear that night ) then three gift from Santa and a stocking . now times this all by 4 kids it a lot of gift under that tree 24 gifts or more .. i really don't want to ever over due gift to my children , they have all the need but i love to give them one want the at Christmas isn't that Christmas about in the magic of the season.
i also don't want to lose site of the reason for season for my children and we try not we have many traditions to hold this to heart .
well my sons home for christmas break his grade are pretty good for a freeman first semter if he continutes through college with these grade i be happy he not a A student or should say he got many A through the year but not his thing does what it take to get through and well that good enough for him . so we got two A three B and a C so not bad .....

as this year comes to an end i sit and reflex how far all the kids have come and where we are all going ... merry christmas

world wind life raising kids

where this month go . i have thought many time come to post or write .
there so much going on so i live one day and don't know much ahead of it . i have always lived my life this was helps with stress . i mean i am a planning , list maker and love note cards and post it notes lol . i plan for vacations sport fee and holidays . Christmas . Christmas to me is much simply then what it used to be . i love sitting down and having family dinner , watching my kids sing in church on Christmas eve and being in the Christmas play .
we have had some heart breaks this week my oldest dd got cut from basketball high school , it was a little shocker as she a great Athletic but basketball not her main sport . she also hurt all through try out and wrong shoes all three days . och ok we are over and i am sure bigger and better things to come .
i kind of miss my son it been like a month or it seems scents he been home be home Tuesday night yahoo .... until Sunday . i just want to see he ok i guess . i am one proud mama though .'
the girls they are good keeping us jumping busy both play basketball that 3 to 4 nights a week between two off them
one or two nights at church or and school . we all doing good growing up so much i wish some times i could freeze that time for just a minute .
i feel very blessed this Christmas
work is good , dh at least working part time . on average with looks of staying on most of the time .
i am taking little pieces of my house and clearing them out and cleaning them up i sure wish i had more time to do it or hum engery to or the want but bady sets are good right . today was bathroom closet and upstair bathroom and set up holiday deco out side (had to the weather was great )

Why didnot i know parents was not easy for my mom

i hate all the choose we make to be good parents . i know sounds funny but i wish i could get my kids to understand . i know it sucks i say no but i have reason . it not easy for me either to say no . why did not i know this when i was a kid a teen . why i am i just learning this now at 40 . i love my kids i do anything and i am a parents that will specific things for my children . time and money if there is spent with them (with in reason of course and balance it all ) . i just want what best for them , keeping them safe helping them grow up making good decisions of course . why is it hard and as teens harder for them to see . it all dumb stuff but to a teen i know it now and they think i am the meanest mom in world . it a fine line to walk to find a medium and not push them to far away . i am sure some of the thing i say no would be OK . my kids are good kids , get good grade ,decanted to sportsmanship and they church but still they are teens and my job to guild them and say no ! i am sure tomorrow it be something new to say no to and one of them wont like me much tomorrow . joys of parent hood i guess .